So this trip between what my in-laws have given me and what 2 others have given me I've collected 4 more sarees. My in-laws have also given me multiple sarees. The tally keeps going up. I have made it a goal that before I leave I want to learn how to tie them well. I can do an okay job that impresses people as the American who gave it a shot, but I want it to look like a real authentic Indian did it. If you don't know what a saree looks like before it's all wrapped up around someone I'll explain it to you. There's a jacket that hits at about your rib line, then a petty coat skirt for underneath that you place whereever you feel comfortable with it sitting and the gap between the skirt and jacket (I usually like to hike mine up well above my belly button, I'm not comfortable with too much skin showing) Then basically you have this long piece of cloth, and I mean long, that you wrap around, tuck, fold, and pin in various places. It's really the length of the piece of cloth that makes me feel overwhelmed. I've enlisted my mother-in-law and family friend Jyothi to help me accomplish this task (they sure are patient people). While learning how to do this I've been thinking of how learning to tie a saree, which has really been a very challenging thing for me to learn, can really apply to anything in life. Here's how:
1. Don't be afraid to ask for help. It took me a little bit of courage to ask these ladies, mostly because I was afraid I'd be a slow learner, but how else would I learn.
2.Don't be afraid to ask too many questions the first couple times-then you learn better sooner and don't feel silly asking it a long way down the road.
3. Watch first, but don't be afraid to try it as soon as possible. That's when the real questions pop up and your brain can understand better what it's trying to learn.
4. Don't be afraid of making a mistake and looking foolish. Mistakes are where we learn the most. The first time I asked my mother-in-law to really intentionally show me how to put it on I first tied it how I had been tying it so she could see it, and so I would have a fresher memory of what she and I did differently and where my mistakes were. It helped I found out I was beginning it wrong by tucking it in the wrong place.
5. Never be ashamed to write things down. For me things always stick better if I write plus I can always look back at it. Probably no one will be able to understand my saree notes, but I will.
6. Sometimes we have to get up close and personal with people. It's okay, it may be uncomfortable at times but sometimes that's how we learn best. My mother-in-law is short and in order to reach to wrap the cloth around me she's right there pretty close. Uncomfortable? A little, probably for her too, but how else would I learn.
7.Sometimes you get poked and there's a little bit of pain (maybe even blood), but if you practice enough you learn how to do things more skillfully and easily.
8. Always be willing to not take yourself too seriously and when you end up looking silly (like with a lopsided saree) laugh and enjoy the silliness.
I'm planning on trying to tie a saree everyday, even if I don't wear one everyday, as long as can with the "mentors", so for the rest of the trip. Maybe I can find some friends to have a saree tying party with when I get home and practice on them ;)
1. Don't be afraid to ask for help. It took me a little bit of courage to ask these ladies, mostly because I was afraid I'd be a slow learner, but how else would I learn.
2.Don't be afraid to ask too many questions the first couple times-then you learn better sooner and don't feel silly asking it a long way down the road.
3. Watch first, but don't be afraid to try it as soon as possible. That's when the real questions pop up and your brain can understand better what it's trying to learn.
4. Don't be afraid of making a mistake and looking foolish. Mistakes are where we learn the most. The first time I asked my mother-in-law to really intentionally show me how to put it on I first tied it how I had been tying it so she could see it, and so I would have a fresher memory of what she and I did differently and where my mistakes were. It helped I found out I was beginning it wrong by tucking it in the wrong place.
5. Never be ashamed to write things down. For me things always stick better if I write plus I can always look back at it. Probably no one will be able to understand my saree notes, but I will.
6. Sometimes we have to get up close and personal with people. It's okay, it may be uncomfortable at times but sometimes that's how we learn best. My mother-in-law is short and in order to reach to wrap the cloth around me she's right there pretty close. Uncomfortable? A little, probably for her too, but how else would I learn.
7.Sometimes you get poked and there's a little bit of pain (maybe even blood), but if you practice enough you learn how to do things more skillfully and easily.
8. Always be willing to not take yourself too seriously and when you end up looking silly (like with a lopsided saree) laugh and enjoy the silliness.
I'm planning on trying to tie a saree everyday, even if I don't wear one everyday, as long as can with the "mentors", so for the rest of the trip. Maybe I can find some friends to have a saree tying party with when I get home and practice on them ;)
